Sunday, October 23, 2005


so yeh... you might be wondering why im not in jail if i got sentenced to some hot days in prison. welllll i appealed it. sorry... no sitcom... well maybe... we shall see how the appeal goes. holyyy shit. so after court and stat test, sai came to see uva and woah. WOAH> ! exclamrjtlmation. spelled horribly wrong. so here are three weirddd things:

1. come back! you took your leave too quickly, and im going to retaliate by taking your... ummm... ipod. ha! (that took me exactly two and a half minutes to think of... and its not funny at all.)

2. i wonder if there is some sort of genetic compatibility thing because our moms are like best friends and i havent felt so much like friends with someone after in like less than 24 hours of total hanging out ever in ever... except maybe in like preschool when all you had to do was draw eachother a picture and share crackers or something. but fuck that, i dont want crackers. and now that i think about it, turns out we did that, too. we hung out in florida when we were like... four. but i definetly wasnt all that into global governance and public policy and stuff back then... or was i? (see profile: preschool clubs.) but the whole genetic thing... my mom is absolutely nothing nothing nothing like me, so that doesnt make any sense.

and 3. number 2 is much much longer than number 1.

(note to self: stop listening to so much death cab.)

the ride home was a splendid rush of like eighty different sentiments. (i totally just replaced the word emotions with sentiments in hopes of sounding like less of a vagina.) i suppose i had kind of put off reflecting on anything for the whole weekend until i was in a position to be peaceful and reflect on apples and oranges for the first time in... hmmm... a long ass time... like 5 or 6 days? something like that... but yeh. so ill enumerate the weird amalgamation of emotions... it was something along the lines of...

"this is weird, im dropping my parents off at the airport and god theyre old and god im old and god life is wierd." (so my parents are in las vegas... what the hell?)

"i saw all my friends. i like them." (finally... i think that was the longest no visitation ever...)

"i miss my not cousin. what a cool cat."

"god this weather is fucking awesome."

"i have a test tomorrow. i had a test thursday. i hate tests."

"the government wants me in jail. i want to lead a revolution. its sealed. we are arch enemies... there is little to no room for reconciliation." (and closer to none than little.)

and finally... "lenin and che. sigh..." <3

all at once while listening to silly music.

so i suppose now im going to the library... and being really distracted... with prices inflating. inflatinggggg.

yeh seriously... how appropriate. heres my ending... so when i got back and felt all weird and weird... james, paul, and john came and cuddled with me in my bed and let me tell them all about it. which was sort of like drinking lemonade when your really hot and thirsty at warped tour... only it wasnt john, paul, or james... because if it were, the lemonade totally wouldve been some kids urine. so luckily it wasnt any of them. wink.

being a complete anarcho-capitalist, i should probably stop naming my cats after communist revolutionaries. orrr nottt. (hey andre... call me when you read this you asshole.)


Thursday, October 20, 2005


on second thought... "$mashkan goes to jail" could make a really funny sitcom. i smell a hit reality tv show.



let me start by saying this. there is no common wealth in the commonwealth. the very name in itself is a digrace to the seal it claims to represent. wealth is inanimate. wealth is value, and common wealth is value that posseses the traits of nonrivalrous consumption and nonexclusion, such value perhaps vested in a park or another such venture. wealth can not govern. wealth can not infringe. wealth can not steal. wealth can not kill. our government is not an inanimate collection of wealth available for nonrivalrous consumption by the citizenry. our state is governed by those who claim the right to exclusive use of such wealth, given to them by a majority of a group selected by a majority of another group selected by a majority of some other group, all in all creating a very random group that claims to represent a majority that posseses the right to delegate the right to negate the consent of even the members that compose their majority. our state is governed by men who use this right so justifiably handed to them to create goods so exclusive in consumption that it is explicitly declared that the citizenry may not have access to such goods. they are the tools and agents of infringement, typically called arms and police. (or "agents of the state.") then the agents (executive) claim the right to infringe, using the common wealth, (taxes,) which has been vested in them by the majority (legislature) chosen by a few other majorities (gerrymandered voters or perhaps other legislatures), and proceed to infringe unrestrained outside the decided borders (see: war powers act,) and domestically, infringe to the extent another group of men (judges) chosen by their commander (president) orders them to. the responsibility for infringment is so spread out amongst so many agents that each one is fully capable of cognitive dissonance to the point where that the individual agents will even carry out infringements they themselves abhor. (see: vietnam.) which bring me to the reason i'm writing this. i was sentenced to a month in prison today for traversing land at a rate of 85 miles per hour. the majority of some random governing body decreed that i should only move at a rate of 65 miles per hour... not even the agents of the state themselves would move so slowly. i could not help but smile, when i looked above the man who delegated the task of infringing upon my person to some others and i read the words to myself, "sic semper tyrannis." the irony was too apparent to be unintentional. these men, under the auspices of bringing death to tyrants, were physically infringing upon me. had i infringed? was i a tyrant? this was doublethink at its finest. they certainly noticed i did not look at them, but only stared at the seal as my prison sentence was read. those who certainly thought it as ridiculous as i, proceeded to carry out the paperwork and escorting. but they made no eye contact and said nothing to me... only whispers filled the room. "did he say jail?" i slung my bag over my shoulder, filled with econ books detailing the loss of wealth wrought by government regulation, quietly whispered "may liberty bind you and justice find you," and walked out. now i query... shall i serve my sentence? or shall i take to the hills? a fateful choice indeed.


Tuesday, October 4, 2005


everywhere i go people i know everywhere i fo! GO! joe! SHMOE! sigh. blown away. impromptu hats off to all of them. IMPRMPTY. cant stand how much i love. EVERYONE!

its. too. easy. to. be. happy. in. this. place.